Monday, August 19, 2013

Conversations with Kathy


---- Elizabeth Pope <ehpope@embarqmail.com> wrote:
> My notes after talking with Dan are my thoughts based on the hour long phone call. I did not take notes per se.
>
> -------
> Try Transition: "Who does Try want to be?"
> •          Find fun stuff for Try. (cross training is always good for horse and rider)

> •          Get help from Dan in transitioning re balancing mental/emotional with need for physical fitness. This will be the subject of the September session.

> •          Maintaining good ground manners/connection/partnership (always important)

> •          Purpose oriented: Try will to some extent put in effort but maybe not exuberance but not hate it. With lessons with Kathy my intent is clearer giving purpose( while you are learning the concept and mechanics - that is what you are focused on. I can help direct you toward a focus/purpose and help you correct misunderstandings on the part of the horse & rider, so it seems to ride better.)  (Like everything learning anything new takes time! teaching/directed practice, process, assessment, reteach, assess, (reteach as much as needed), guided practice, process, assess for understanding, correct mechanics & feel.  At the end you can look for ways to synthesize, what you now understand and can perform, and create new ways of incorporating it into your work routine/make it part of a new pattern etc. I feel that horses like people at work are not always having fun, but understand that this is your job and not everything is fun-filled every day.  I loved teaching Art, and it was what I wanted to do, but it had it's moments that were not fun.  We can do for our horses what we mostly can't do for ourselves, by breaking our riding/training into bite sized pieces, cross training to build muscle and fitness and approach our goals  from different directions.  We can also take mental holidays and reward our horse by doing something new & fun after training as reward and relaxation)

> •          Dressage—detail oriented not Try's fav/if its competition driven it would never be right for Try BUT for Health and fitness yes. Issue: How to be creative—put it into practice/obstacles and dressage on the trail/creativity. I am not going to try to duplicate what I do in lessons with Kathy when alone with Try for a while anyway. ( Remember, having both  the horse & rider trying to learn at the same time is hard.  There have been times when Try had figured out the movement and offered more to show off her creativity. She might have struggled for the right answer, but after she processed it and was rewarded, she often came back taking control as her personal celebration; she looked very pleased with herself at the end of a session.  Dressage is just training!  Pure and simple. It is a well thought out program of using a horses natural movement and building an understanding of how to communicate what the horse can do naturally with being able to perform it with a rider onboard.  Of course it takes time to build the muscles to carry the rider and duplicate their natural movement.  Competition does not ever have to be the goal.  Just like Parelli uses many pattern/exercises to build the horse mentally & physically, Dressage does the same - many Parelli exercises were dressage exercises first.  Some of the creativity comes into play when you string together several exercises into a longer string/pattern where you move from one into another with a feeling of oneness, flow, relaxation and a mutual understanding and respect.  Find a piece of music you like and think of ways you can choreograph a ride with different tempos, gaits and movements so you can begin to dance with your horse.  Don't worry about technicalities of beats per min.  Or take pieces of walk,trot music that have the same feel/genre and just ride and enjoy.  If anything is a problem , just go on, go forward and do something else. enjoy!!  i used to do leg yields out on trail and circle work where there was open space on trail, it was fun as we had lots of implusion out on trail.
  Right now trying what we did in lesson is OK, but if you run into being unsure go ahead and go do something else.)

> •          2-3 hour session with Dan last summer—
>             o             Perfectly pleasant/bonding/tuned in for 1.5 hr liberty in the field--Try stays tuned in because of variety and rest and establishing connection.
>             o             Try won’t like repetition of something she’s got right nor maintaining without clear purpose/variety. (True!  She also enjoys it when you ride with purpose and focus and allow your body memory come into play.  This is something you need to do more of on your own and in lessons during guided or independent practice.)
>             o             Get it done and be done. Even twice can be too much.  (Often we stop when I've seen Try "get it" and let her process it or we take a break and then go out for a short one, this is usually where she offers to do one better - lol)
> •          Crabbiness as a habit
>             o             Good to address it to prevent it as a habit or break a habit
>             o             Western pleasure could surely create a lifelong habit of crabbiness

>             o             Fix it in a relaxed manner with as little drama as possible ( I agree with this - do something easy so she feels good about herself)

> •          Go out and ride, fix the attitude issue riding ( When you are riding on your own and she is unmotivated, look at how you feel and if you are uptight...go do something else)

> •          Try’s semi-retirement: I think twice a week with me, once with Dawn as her schedule permits.
>             o             Physically I want Try to be as fit as is healthy for her while giving her a break from drilling and boredom. Strength muscular/aerobic and suppleness.
>             o             Mentally I want to add variety, problem-solving and success to keep her active and not turn into a vegetable or bring on mental problems i.e. depression.  (I agree)
>             o             Grooming: maintain. She has always been treated as a show horse and I have no intention of lessening her standard of living.
> Thoughts other than Try Transition
> •          Devon is a high level horse with natural talent for movement and enjoys moving more/has a different attitude toward moving than Try does tho both are LBI. Try is talented physically—powerful horse and intellectually—excellent learner---She just doesn’t want to do it--tho she will be obedient to please me and sometimes will be intrigued by newness or challenge.
> •          Is there anything I can offer Devon? Any benefit for Devon to have me as a rider? Whats in it for him?  (You can offer him understanding of his psychological and physical needs in ways they have never been offered to him.  Think of how Key discovered things and began to think and make choices.  So many H/J are obedient but have never had choices or problem solving.)

> •          Parelli system holds little value for me at this stage—I will never pursue formally passing level 4 with Try and possibly never pursue levels again with any horse--it feels strangely artificial. Good horsemanship is good horsemanship. I am firmly a believer in the Parelli philosophy and psychology but following levels and tasks isn’t the right thing right now. Any further purchases of educational materials will be related to my goals of improving my riding and learning about horse development. The new levels pack--unlikely to be beneficial.  ( I have never been interested in Parelli for the commercial Parelli package, but for a new way of looking at horses and in how training them with thought being given for them to problem solve and make choices.  This type of success combined with training is a win-win combo.)

ok I give up--slight chance it might not be really raining for 30 minutes around 11am--guess I will head out to the barn this am and likely will only be able to groom and do barn chores. DRAT!

I will call you this am.

To follow up on last email:
1. Mental holiday: perhaps, despite my confusion over Try's past weeks of crabbiness and some sadness over the conscious realization that we will not be passing Parelli level 4 (the reason I have been commiting so much time and $ to lessons with Dan), the time off has been good for Try as she has been more pleasant this week. Also on this subject, Dawn and I have ridden together twice. Dawn is learning to ride Try and they are getting along well as she has no learning agenda (in grad sch and in Coast Guard--just wants to ride for fun). So we just walk and talk and Try loves being with Devon as we do so.
2. "oneness, flow, relaxation" and riding from my body memory: this seems like it should be highest priority right now a. I realize in riding Devon that I have been riding Try with an abundance of pushing energy and when I recognize and relax that energy with Devon who is more motivated and talented at having free swingy gaits that I am experiencing short times (i.e. 1/2 way around the ring) of feeling a passenger in a whole new let-loose way riding a glorious feeling trot and canter. So I want to bring this back to my time with Try.
b. Is this what you have meant by holding Try back? This has saddened me very greatly as Try is the horse of my heart and I only want the best for her.
3. I would like to talk with you further when we get together about choreography to music and ideas for the trail.
4. Fixing negative attitude: I have recently experienced--rather than a whole join-up session of pressure--rather than cause an attitude change to allow a change--tho that is more for a right brain horse it is working better. For instance, if she is balky to the extent that I feel uncomfortable riding to hop off and allow her to circle online until she releases the emotion. Or if safety is not a concern i.e. in the ring if she says no and canters a few steps in protest I can say--"Oh you want to canter Try, me too, I love to canter"--then off we go until she relaxes which will likely be more than a mile.
5. More on fixing--In early July I redid Try's positive and negative charts and she was completely off the negative chart and well up on the positive one. I like that a lot and am willing to compromise and let her "get away" with some stuff/not fight every battle to maintain that and prevent the negativity I have seen recently. Dan says--100% obedient is being a slave and we talked about allowing her to be who SHE chooses to be.
6. Devon and choices. Good point you made. I am getting some occasional coaching (free) from Bethanna on what she has learned about riding Devon (maybe the horse of her heart)--for instance with downward transitions: 1. I realize its coming and check that nothing in my body is asking for it yet then 2. let up a bit of energy and leg 3. check to see if Devon has got the message that the transition is coming and then AND ONLY then ask for the transition with body weight and voice not reins. Because of the year I have had with you I can discuss riding Devon with Bethanna if an entire different way.
7. The commercial Parelli package--thank you so much for putting it that way so I can see the separation. And now that you mention it, lots of people I know are not really following that package. I have been a faithful follower for 9? years and now I think I can just graduate myself from the package and follow the philosophy.

Other:
1. Vet comes Monday am to check Try out carefully for anything physical that could be contributing to her recent unhappiness.
2. I would like to discuss whether you could help me with finding tension in Try's body when I am circling her on line.
3. Also to what extent do you think on line circling could promote physical development without being too much pressure or boring repetition.
4. Parelli recommends in its new goal setting for those wanting never ending improvement of their horsemanship sans levels--to warm up on the ground for 5 minutes, ride freestyle for 45 and finesse for 10. Any thoughts?

Talk to you/see you soon. Too bad about the rain.
Elizabeth

-1.5 hour phone conversation to follow up on all this

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