Sunday, November 30, 2014

MMJ BMe Update

On Sun, Nov 23, 2014 at 7:13 AM, Elizabeth Pope <ehpope@embarqmail.com> wrote:

Hi Mary,
Lisa and I got together yesterday. I thought she did great with Tiara--was able to see Tiara progressively relaxing, increasing the alignment and the catch the thought goes pretty well for them with the dressage background. That's the good news. 
I learned a lot playing with Try yesterday. Mainly I learned if she isn't in the mood and I can't change it, there will be no sincere alignment so no point in going on.  
(Note: Try bit two people this week and snapped at another when they tried to put her halter on her in the pasture--very uncharacteristic for my perfectly wonderful warm, loving, safe friend. Both vets have checked her out and found nothing physical. I have asked Try what is going on and she is saying to me--if I am hearing her correctly--"I am in a bad mood, I don't know why, I am confused, I don't want to do anything, LEAVE ME ALONE, do not ask me to do anything.") 
2 minute video--not sure it is worth your time to watch but link is included below. 

1. Because Try was cranky I picked her to play with thinking she might enjoy the low-keyed attention in the sunshine etc.
2. GM she was fairly relaxed but tuned out--energy ribbon not leading to more relaxation so went on to alignment. I kept trying to find a way to reward the slightest relaxation and release but she wasn't offering any. I stopped and rubbed her forehead at one point and she did melt for me really well--this is our go to spot for relaxation.
3. Alignment: although it got slightly better as we went along and we did both sides, I could see her cutting her eyes at me and she was so slow--no energy put forth to connect with me--I was embarrassed to see the video. I am wondering if I need MORE TM energy in some way. Today I plan, however, a session just to see if I can change up the mood.
4. Catch the thought: I could see her chest tighten and this was not difficult for her and she responded quickly but she did not have the lovely catch the thought and round up simultaneously that she has had twice in the previous week.
5. A question about teaching Try to soften when I touch her face--am I correct that this is while focusing on the center of her chest and will this lead to Try rounding up every time I touch her face with GM whether I holding lead or not--just touch lovingly while focusing TM energy on the center of her chest?
6. Do you reckon she is bored with what I am doing and do I need to somehow change things up?
7. Will let you know if I have good results today. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iE0CaFDRzJU&feature=youtu.be

From Mary:
Try has so very much pre-exhisting communication with you - she could be getting frustrated when she thinks she should know how to answer you - yet it is not resulting in reward - I would be quick to get out and move on to something else when she first starts to soften in the face the slightest bit - was this video in one time frame? She had a great shift of Energy early on - but then seems to tune out as you went - try to notice when you get a 2 + 2 is 4 and go on the something else.
yes to 5 - but only if she understands clearly that this is the answer - it sounds like she has a lot of other things she is pretty certain are the answers and is getting frustrated if she does not know what path you want her one -
make it really clear just with the slight pressure on the nose for now - lessen the exaggeration of you body moving into hers - and just work on that one 'sheet' of communication - when she softens her face  release - and treat if you want - be real quick to get out and change it up to something else to reward her - she has a lot of well paved roads - we want to be helping the communication on those roads even clearer.
Mary

Mary,

I think this is huge--ordinarily I would be rewarding in so many ways step by step i.e. good girl, pats, rub her forehead, wait, treats (I have 3 categories of treats and am careful how I give them and when--gave treat too late in the previous session then too many. I have so-so treats for ok stuff that I still want to reinforce, good treats for big improvements and a super treat when the session ends.)

In my desire to be perfect in my BMe learning I was only just trying to reward with GM cookies and I think we were both frustrated and communication was so unclear between us.

Also Try is absolutely a horse not to drill--move on when she gets it!
Will let you know how it goes--between rain and barn being inundated with water, I have lost consistency.

From Mary:
Please keep me in the loop on Try's progress - Anytime I've had anyone say their horse was nippy or cranky it has usually stemmed from the horse being frustrated by the human's communication - and this is one of those things that can be really hard to diagnose via internet - if I need to come up for a short visit just for you and Try - I am willing to do that to ensure I am helping guide you both in the way I intend - just keep me posted please :-) MMJ

Will keep you informed. Try has cranky periods. She had a bad one August of 2013 and vet found arthritis issues--injected hocks/adequan. I have whatever vet is at the barn continuing to check this and so far no need for repeat of this. Last January, Try was cranky and vet thought it might be hormones in aging mare. But now if it is physical neither vet can find anything. I am considering chiropractor for accupuncture or massage therapist.

Also she is grumpy in her pasture when I drive in before she even sees me AND her biting people/children when I am not even there and Try doesn't even know them--doesn't seem an immediate reaction to human communication. It could be a general frustration to humans, weather, her 2 y/o pasture mate, arthritis. I am very concerned as I want this to be a good time in her life when she feels good, is healthy and feels loved and valued.

Will let you know.

Thank you for offering the workshop and sharing your expertise!!! YES to continuing with the workshop on a monthly basis.

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COURSE WRAPUP QUESTIONS: I would like to ask that you respond to the following questions with candor and heart. (you may reply in the body of an email or attach a word doc)
1. What have you discovered is your best way of creating GM within yourself? Little smile and think of my golden girl Try. I even think of it as GM golden mode. I think of how much I love her and love to stroke her golden coat. I have this linked to the "one with the universe" state of mind I learned to create years ago. I don't always remember to bring GM forth in me LOL!! However, if I want it, its there.
2. What have you discovered is the best way to guide your horse to reach GM? Stroke her forehand and ears and she will melt. She doesn't see the energy ribbon as a cue to melt--just tolerates it. I believe I de-sensitized her to it. OR perhaps I need to find ways to give her a reason to want to relax/be released from pressure.
3. Out of all 8 Sessions - which was the easiest for you and why? I just looked back through them and I don't feel that any of them were/are easy. In a way working on myself is the most difficult as it requires working on some fundamental change and the need for fairly constant awareness of my relaxation and positive thinking. On the other hand, applying sessions with Try and Sephira are more difficult because I am not the only one in control of what happens.
4. Which Session was the hardest and why? Session 1 thankfulness/GM/relaxation--creating in myself what my horses would like to experience.
5. Was the workshop what you expected it to be? Please elaborate. I had few expectations--my feeling was that I just wanted to learn more about using energy and visualization with my horses. So the workshop exceeded my expectations.
6. What was the most challenging part of the workshop as a whole? I have tried to not use Parelli methods along with the energy ribbon/B Me to further my learning and I think it was a mistake as it takes me away from using my intuition to focus in so much on learning a technique. (I am task oriented enough as is.) I have done the Parelli so long that I am not sure it is even Parelli but just me--I do have the right brain/big energy/artistic creativity part very strong in me and my intuition with horses is good if I will just let it be the highest priority.
7. What would you say that you have gained from this workshop? Belief in my ability to communicate with Try and Sephira on a deeper level.

8. Is there any constructive criticism you could offer to help the program help more horses & humans in the future? I have not tried session 8 yet with Try and Sephira. The fact that the workshop went eight weeks was a positive for more time for exploration but I suspect my de-sensitizing may have come from not moving along when Try and Sephira needed it. When I signed up for the course the Aug/Sept time frame was a selling point for me--i.e. to use that hot August time productively. I knew October would be difficult with trips/projects etc and I dropped the ball for nearly a month and lost momentum and lost the depth of GM I had been using/creating.

I wonder if there is a way for the facebook group to be more learning oriented. I am happy to like and support everyone--that is me. I am not comfortable posting there all the time if it is more than others as that feels selfish.

I wonder if there is a way to make journaling more a part of the workshop--I blog and make notes on the course each time I play with my horses and I am keeping a notebook with the course text, my notes, your notes, private session notes, etc.

I actually think I have a fairly good intellectual grasp of the course work BUT when I am with my horses I lose pieces and am never as effective as when you are there. I do make a list of key points and memorize them before I go to the barn and still have trouble in action remembering 5 or so points simultaneously. LOL I realized with Lisa and Tiara--that the points to remember come to me so easily, steps to follow etc--when I am just WATCHING. I want so much to read my horses moments as they happen and not miss important stuff.

ok I am rambling. Thank you for undertaking sharing your knowledge with us.!!!!!

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